


The Do's and Don't's of Living With Cats

by bookworm213



Category: Black Widow (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Bucky and Natasha move in together, BuckyNat Secret Santa 2019, Endgame fix-it (sort of), F/M, I'm not really considering this fic as shipping two cats but think whatever you want lol, Kittens, things with their cats get . . . complicated
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-11
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:07:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22213039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookworm213/pseuds/bookworm213
Summary: “Well, “ the vet sighed, looking down at Liho, who was stretched out on the table, looking more calm than she was allowed to given the situation. “She’s definitely expecting kittens. When the female goes into heat, she starts spraying. Alpine here just happened to be the only un-neutered male around. Looks like she’s due to give birth in a couple weeks.”Natasha looked at James.“Your cat violated my cat,” she said, sounding half furious and half like she wanted to burst out laughing.James groaned. “Fuck.”Post-Endgame, Bucky and Natasha finally decide to move in together after admitting their feelings for each other. The problem is, they both forgot about the whole spaying/neutering thing for their cats Liho and Alpine . . .
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 5
Kudos: 100





	The Do's and Don't's of Living With Cats

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MissMorwen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMorwen/gifts).



> Buckynat Secret Santa gift for missmorwen, who requested: Bucky and Nat are moving in together, but how does their respective cats Alpine and Liho take this? Bonus question: Does their friends even know they are together and/or that they both have cats?
> 
> I hope you enjoy it and sorry about not including the last question: I just got so caught up in the cat thing I forgot!!!
> 
> I've actually been wanting to write a fic like this for a long time so thank you for giving me the excuse!!

In retrospect, they both should’ve realized. 

Natasha had never meant to take in a stray. Liho had just . . . shown up at the window of her apartment one day. All sleek black fur and piercing green eyes, she had scratched at the window and yowled until Natasha couldn’t take it anymore and let the damn cat in. Liho had then proceeded to rub up against every piece of furniture in the apartment, and then jump into Natasha’s lap and knead her thighs so fiercely that the spy had cuts on her legs for the next week. Natasha had kicked Liho out at the first opportunity, assuming the cat merely wanted some food and would move on and fine someone else on her block to harass the next day.

The next evening, the cat was back. And then next evening. And the next evening.

After several weeks of steadfastly denying it, despite consistently putting out food and making the very stupid decision to give the cat a name, Natasha finally sighed and admitted to herself that, like it or not, she definitely had a cat now. And maybe some small little part of her did like it, although she wasn’t going to admit that just yet.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Bucky had found Alpine while on a mission in the Swiss Alps, of all places. SHIELD got wind of some generic bad-guy organization hiding out out there, so naturally, knowing that Bucky loved freezing his ass off in the mountains, they’d sent him to investigate. He was dropped off at some remote, run-down cabin, which they claimed he could hole up in for the night where the enemy base wouldn’t get wind of his presence. After busting open the crumbling doors to the place, the first thing James had seen was a tiny bundle of white fur curled up in the corner.

The thing was emaciated, tiny, and shivering. And Bucky, like the total sap that he was, immediately wrapped the cat up in his coat. To say SHIELD was surprised when he showed up back at base the next day, his clothes covered in dust and soot from the mountain base exploding, and a tiny cat tucked under his arm, would be an understatement. 

Alpine (aptly named due to the location where Bucky had found the poor thing) had quickly grown into a rather spoiled and un-cat-like cat, mainly due to his love of joining his owner in the shower or bath. Thanks to Bucky’s bad habit of overindulgence, Alpine had also bulked up a great deal, now bearing an uncanny resemblance to a potato with albinism. 

So yes, Bucky had settled quite comfortably into life as a cat dad, but that doesn’t mean he was in any way prepared for what was to come.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Bucky and Natasha love each other. They are completely utterly, head-over-heels in love with each other.

It just . . . took a long time for them both to admit it. 

Bucky remembered her, of course he did. He remembered stolen kisses during training and missions. He remembered warm lips and soft hands, sneaking into her room at night. He remembers her screaming and the agony of the chair when they were finally caught. 

That day in Wakanda, when she stepped off the quinjet with Steve and Sam, he wanted to tell her that he remembered everything. But then Thanos’s army attacked, and he somehow woke up five years later, fought Thanos’s army again, and then he had to be told that Natasha was dead. Gone. Sacrificed herself to save everyone, including him. Except she wasn’t actually dead. She had come back when Bruce snapped his fingers, except no one knew that she was alive on that cursed purple planet. It took days before she could get a signal to earth, and another few days before SHIELD and what was left of the Avengers and the Guardians could get a ship out there to rescue her. When she was finally back on earth, she was quiet, almost haunted. I looked like she was carrying a weight she hadn’t been before. Dying and coming back to life was a lot to deal with, in a sense Bucky knew that more than anyone else.

So naturally, given all that . . . he needed to give her space, right?

Well, that wasn’t always possible, because with half it’s population suddenly coming back, Earth was suddenly very much in need of it’s current roster of heroes (why Bucky suddenly counted among that roster, he had no clue), so that meant the two of them were often tasked on missions together and humanitarian trips. Trips that meant they were often together in very uncomfortably close quarters and shit Bucky wanted to give her time to heal she didn’t need him overcomplicating her life but shit he was so close to her all the time and he couldn’t stop the thoughts of their time together from running through his head 24/7 and she’s so beautiful fuck-

In the end, she admitted it before he did. He had been organizing his gear alone in the quinjet when she unexpectedly joined him. He’d turned to find her standing behind him, still dressed in her suit and gear, eyeing him with an almost reproachful expression. Before he could say anything, she had crossed the threshold between them and kissed him, her arms wrapping around his neck and fingers intertwining in his hair. Bucky’s initial shock dissipated almost instantly, and he melted into the kiss, with no time for second thoughts.

When she finally pulled away, her eyebrows were raised and a smirk was playing on her lips. 

“You remember me now, asshole?”

Bucky started laughing. “If I didn’t remember before, I do now.”

Natasha wrapped her arms around him again. “Good, because it took us long enough to be together again. I don’t want to waste another moment.”

——————————————————————————————————————————

So, naturally, after a few months, and a well-deserved break from SHIELD and the Avengers, the two of them decided that Bucky would move into Natasha’s apartment in NYC. After endless nights of only getting alone time in hotel rooms and on base after missions, the thought of living somewhere together was near bliss. The problem? They had both just adopted cats, willingly or unwillingly. At first, it didn’t seem like a problem. Natasha knew that Liho interacted with other cats on the streets, and when her and Bucky had slowly introduced the two cats through a screen door on Natasha’s porch, Alpine had seemed more disinterested in the other cat than anything else. No hissing or scratching, no fights. No problem, right?

The thing was, while Bucky and Natasha had done the general vet checks for both their cats, including shots, they had never really asked about . . . well, the spaying and neutering part of the program. With both of them constantly out on missions while being world-class spies, there was little time to think about these kinds of things. Ok, so maybe the vet had mentioned it to both of them once or twice, and maybe they had just both . . . forgot.

Yes, they definitely should have known. 

——————————————————————————————————————————

Natasha woke up in the bed they shared James’s arms wrapped around her waist, gagging at the smell that now permeated the room. 

It was acidic, like vinegar, and overpowering. In the other room, she heard something like a spray bottle going off, and a high pitched yowl that felt like nails in her ears. 

Natasha sat straight up, coughing violently. The sudden movement caused James to let out a groan of protest.

“Whhattss wrong?” He mumbled out sleepily, before the smell invaded his nose and he started coughing.

“What the fuck-???“

“Liho!” Natasha scrambled out of bed, nearly knocking the lamp on the side table over. She threw the door to their bedroom open. 

The first thing Natasha saw were the dark stains on the wall and carpet. Liho was pacing back and forth and yowling, and Natasha realized the source of the smell and stains when the black cat lifted her hind leg.

Natasha cursed out loud as she snatched Liho up from the ground. The cat let out another yowl of outrage and clawed her owner’s arm. 

“Goddamn it!” Natasha turned around to find James standing in the bedroom doorway, taking in the scene before him with a still-groggy, shocked expression.

“What the hell Nat-“

“Get some rags and disinfectant,” Natasha said through gritted teeth, still attempting to hold onto the thrashing cat. “Where’s Alpine?” 

James rushed past her into the living area, only to find Alpine nonchalantly curled up in the widow sill. The white cat gave his owner a tranquil look and yawned, seemingly oblivious to the chaos that was going on just a few feet away. 

James sighed and rolled his eyes as he went into the kitchen to grab cleaning supplies. 

When he returned, Liho had stopped spraying and had managed to settle down long enough for Natasha to lower her the the floor. 

“This is . . . new.” James observed, surveying the damage that decorated the hallway.

Natasha groaned, putting her head in her hands. “Liho . . . she’s never done this before . . .”

“Hey, it’s ok.” James walked over and put his arms around her. “Let’s get this cleaned up, we’ll put her and Alpine in the bedroom so they won’t get in the way. Then maybe we can take her to the vet and see what’s wrong.”

Natasha sighed. “Yeah, ok. Did your blimp of a cat really sleep through all this?”

James feigned a look of offense, “Alpine’s big-boned-“

“There are tuna cans that would disagree, James,” Natasha shot back, her tone lightening and a smirk forming on her lips despite the mess that still lay before them.

“At least my cat didn’t destroy our hallway,” James retaliated, returning her smirk.

Natasha rolled her eyes. “Just for that, you get to do most of the cleaning. Now go put the cats in the bedroom and let’s get started on this mess.”

——————————————————————————————————————————

At first, Alpine wasn’t too keen on leaving his napping spot, letting out a mew of protest when Bucky lifted his hefty body from the window sill. But when Bucky placed him in the room with Liho, the white cat suddenly perked up, lifting his head to sniff the air as his tail started swiping back and forth. At least the cats hadn’t put up a fight, Bucky thought to himself as he closed the bedroom door. 

After hours of cleaning, the stains and smell were mostly gone. But there was still as unpleasant vinegar scent lingering in the air when the two assassins collapsed on the couch.

Natasha sighed, pitching the bridge of her nose between her forefinger. “Well, looks like our peace has been shattered.”

Liho had clawed a sizable cut in her arm, and Bucky had quickly gotten some bandages and ointment from the cabinet. He was in the middle of applying the bandage to her arm when she spoke. This task, patching her up, felt almost as natural as breathing. He’d done it hundreds of times over the past few months, fixed up cuts and bruises and bullet wounds. He knew the scars that decorated her body intimately, could point out which ones he’d stitched up, ones he’d healed.

(It had taken a long time for him to forgive himself for the ones he’d inflicted).

Natasha leaned her head against his shoulder. She muttered, “never should’ve let that damn cat-“

“You love her and you know it,” Bucky smirked as he kissed the top of her head. “She’s just getting used to this. She’ll be fine.”

Natasha leaned further into his shoulder, letting her eyes fall shut. It was rare for her to let her guard down like this. She could barely count on one hand how many people she trusted enough not to be on alert. Oh, she was learning to trust more, but this vulnerability was reserved only for the ones she loved. 

And she did love James. Without a doubt.

The smell was still too pungent for them to feel amorous, so they settled for watching Netflix most of the evening. Surprisingly, they didn’t hear Liho and Alpine yowling or scratching at the door. Maybe they had gone to sleep. Either way, the two of them were grateful for the quiet.

—————————————————————————————————————————— 

The next few days, everything seemed fine. They didn’t wake up to anymore yowling and spraying, the smell had finally vanished, and Liho and Alpine seemed to be getting along better than they had been. Bucky had walked into the living room one day to fine Alpine meticulously grooming Liho’s ears. Natasha, who was at base, had gotten gotten back from her mission only to find her phone spammed with pictures, videos, and texts from James fawning over the incident.

It was nice. Things were going well.

Until Liho’s belly started swelling.

Natasha had first noticed it about three weeks after the spraying incident. At first, she thought maybe Liho had been eating more than usual. But her and James hadn’t been putting out more food and usual, and if one of the cats was going to eat extra, she would put her money on Alpine. 

Then Liho had rolled onto her back while she was sunning herself in the window, and Natasha noticed that the cat’s nippled had grown darker, standing out a dark shade of pink against the paler pink of her visible skin under the black fur.

Everything clicked into place.

“Shit,” Natasha breathed. “Shit, shit shit shit shit!”

——————————————————————————————————————————

Alpine, the fluffy white bastard, had the nerve to look smug. The two cats were both sitting on the examination table, and the vet was eyeing Natasha and James with a look that screamed I can’t believe these morons. James, for his part, was alternating between looking shocked, sheepish, and trying not to burst into laughter. 

“Well, “ the vet sighed, looking down at Liho, who was stretched out on the table, looking more calm than she was allowed to given the situation. “She’s definitely expecting kittens. When the female goes into heat, she starts spraying. Alpine here just happened to be the only un-neutered male around. Looks like she’s due to give birth in a couple weeks.”

Natasha looked at James.

“Your cat violated my cat,” she said, sounding half furious and half like she wanted to burst out laughing.

James groaned. “Fuck.”

——————————————————————————————————————————

“Ok, so I called up Sam, and when he stopped laughing he told me one of his VA buddies might know a good shelter where we can take the kittens when she gives birth,” Bucky announced as he dropped onto the couch beside Natasha.

Liho, rather unconscious of the fact that she was in big trouble, had settled into Natasha’s lap, kneading her stomach and purring loudly. Natasha was absentmindedly stroking her fur, gazing out one of the windows. 

Finally, she chuckled, “We were really stupid, weren’t we?”

“Yeah, I guess we were,” Bucky reached over and stroked Liho’s ears. “But hey, it’s not like being stupid isn’t a trademark of our relationship.”

Natasha snorted, “For you, maybe.”

“We’ll find good homes for them, Liho’s going to be fine,” Bucky reassured her. Suddenly, he felt a giant mass land on top of him as Alpine plopped himself into his lap. The white cat’s purr began to vibrate like a car engine, and Bucky laughed.

Natasha looked at him. “I never said I was worried about her-“

“I know you too well.” Bucky kissed the top of her head. Natasha sighed, and rested her head on James’s shoulder, and with Liho and Alpine’s purrs nearly drowning out the low hum of the TV, she admitted to herself that, yes, she did like having a cat.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Alpine, for his part, seemed to be taking his new role as a father-to-be very seriously. He stuck by Liho constantly, sleeping next to her, grooming her, and kneading her ever-growing belly as his purr vibrated through the walls. 

Bucky had taken enough pictures and video's of the two of them together to fill an Instagram account. Natasha, despite her still-lingering uneasiness about the whole situation, was gradually warming to the idea. When she and James weren't on missions, they spent hours watching Liho and Alpine, monitoring how Liho was feeling as well as enjoying the newfound relationship between the two cats. Over the next couple weeks, Natasha had about as many cat pictures on her phone as James.

Once, when the two of them were lying in bed together, half-naked and legs tangled in sheets, James spoke.

“Daisy.”

“Hmm?” Natasha hummed questioningly, running her fingers along the skin of his chest.

“Daisy, that’s a good name. For a girl cat, right?” James shifted a bit to look at her, his eyebrows raised. 

“I guess, why?” Natasha continued stroking his chest, smirking in satisfaction when she saw the touch of her fingertips eliciting goosebumps across the skin.

“I mean, when the kittens are born, they’re going to need names, so maybe Daisy for a girl, Leo for a boy, and then-“

“Isn’t Sam’s friend picking them up once they’re old enough? I think whoever adopts them will want to give them names, James.” Natasha curled further into his chest, feeling a little pang of regret at the words. 

“Yeah . . . yeah, I guess you’re right.” Natasha could tell James was trying to hide the disappointment in his voice. As she lay there, she also couldn’t shake the feeling of regret opening up in her chest.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Liho’s belly continued to grow over the next few weeks. She began disappearing for hours at a time, only appearing at mealtimes when she waddled to her food bowl. She was now, by all accounts, fatter than Alpine, who could at least move with relative ease despite his weight.

One morning, as Natasha was sitting at the kitchen table, she heard a cry coming from the other room. 

She immediately recognized it as Liho’s. Natasha’s heart started pounding at she raced to fine the source of the noise, nearly knocking over the coffee cup she had been drinking from. 

“James!” She yelled as she entered the bedroom, where the source of the noise was coming from.

Liho was panting, curled up in a tangled mess of blankets, sheets, and towels in the bedroom closet. One glance told Natasha that her cat was in labour. Within seconds James was beside her, frantically punching typing something on his phone.

“What do we do? Should we call the vet?” Natasha’s voice dripped worry as she looked at her cat, her cat, curled up in that nest.

“It says that most female cats don’t need help with this, we just need to watch her to see if she’s having trouble.” James’s face was also creased with worry. 

Natasha took a deep breath, and clenched her hands. “Close the door, don’t let Alpine in.” Liho was still panting, occasionally letting out little cries of effort. Natasha positioned herself next to the nest, reaching out and gently stroking the her ears. Natasha had never been the type to pray about anything, but fuck if she didn’t pray now that Liho would be alright.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Eventually, Bucky coaxed Natasha out of the bedroom, having read that mother cats preferred to give birth in private. Natasha was now pacing anxiously around the living room, clenching and unclenching her fists. Alpine had positioned himself in front of the bedroom door, yowling with outrage at the fact that he wasn’t allowed in the delivery room. Bucky had busied himself making a huge pot of coffee and cooking breakfast, trying to appear at least outwardly calm while ignoring the twisting pit of worry in his stomach. 

Several hours passed. During that time, they would occasionally hear Liho’s cries from within the bedroom, and Bucky would have to stop Natasha from throwing the door open. He put down a plate of eggs and pancakes in front of Natasha, which she didn’t eat. Alpine was equally as distraught. Even a can of his favorite wet food (chicken with gravy) wouldn’t make him leave his spot at the door. 

Eventually, they stopped hearing Liho’s cries. Once Natasha realized this, she raced to the door, throwing it open before Bucky had the chance to stop her. Bucky raced in behind her, closing the door just in time to stop Alpine, who’s yowls of outrage were enough to make the solder’s ears ache.

Natasha gasped.

Liho was curled up in her nest, nursing three tiny kittens. One was black, one was white, and the third was white with a huge black spot on it’s back.

Liho’s cries had been replaced with soft purring, her eyes narrowed to tiny slits of pleasure. Bucky snapped out of starring at the new family and shifted his eyes to Natasha.

She was crying.

——————————————————————————————————————————

They stayed with Liho the rest of the day, bringing her food making sure she was alright. Aside from being exhausted from labour, she seemed fine, and she soon fell asleep as her new family continued to nurse, kneading her belly with their tiny paws. 

They both decided that Alpine, to his supreme displeasure, shouldn’t be allowed around the kittens until they were older. But Bucky and Natasha stayed, both of them entranced by the kittens.

Finally, the two of them, having not slept, decided to curl up together on the bed. Bucky kissed Natasha’s forehead sleepily, and she responded by placing a kiss along his jawline. At any other time, this would have been playful and sexual, but they were both too tired for that. Instead, they allowed the sound of Liho’s purring to lull them both into sleep. 

——————————————————————————————————————————

After a couple calls to both the vet and Sam’s VA friend, they both decided it was best to keep Liho and the kittens confined to the bedroom for a few weeks. The brought in Liho’s litter box, as well as food and water. For a few days, the cat was too tired to do anything but stay in her nest. But soon, she was slowly moving around again, leaving her kittens (which James aptly named “fluffy jellybeans”) to wiggle around in the blankets. Their eyes would open in a few weeks, but for now they were so helpless it made Nat’s heart clench. From a few brief examinations, Bucky determined that that black one was a boy, and the white and spotted ones were both girls.

A few weeks later, the kitten’s eyes did open, and they finally allowed Alpine to see them. After giving both Bucky and Natasha a heated yowling session over being kept from his family, the white cat immediately set to grooming both Liho and the kittens, purring loudly as his kids, who could now run and play, began climbing all over him. 

Watching this scene, Bucky wrapped an arm around Natasha and said, “We’re gonna tell Sam’s friend not to pick them up, aren’t we?”

Natasha laughed, giving Bucky a peck on the cheek. “Fuck no, we aren’t.”

——————————————————————————————————————————

They named the kittens Midnight, Snowflake, and Daisy. Midnight, despite being an entirely different color, had the same personality as his father, and was also a total mama’s boy. Snowflake and Daisy were both independent and mischievous, constantly running all over the place and knocking things from shelves. They also had a love of hooking their claws into an unsuspecting pant leg and climbing up Bucky or Natasha like a ladder.

As Natasha sat on the couch, watching Midnight and Snowflake engage in a wrestling match, Liho purring in her lap, she wondered how she had ever been annoyed at Liho scratching at her window.

Beside her was James, her James, with Alpine also curled up in his lap. To think it look dying on a cliff and coming back from the dead for her to finally admit to herself that she loved him. Living with him was the best decision she could have made, even though in the whirlwind they had forgotten one very important thing regarding their cats. And, as the scene before her showed, even that had turned out to be a blessing.

She leaned over and kissed James, feeling both Liho and Alpine shift in annoyance and James leaned further into her, wrapping his metal arm around her waist. 

“Tomorrow I’m calling the vet and setting up appointments for everyone,” James murmured into her lips. “Can’t risk having this happen again.”

Natasha chuckled. “Hmmm, well maybe we could have a few more-“

James pulled away and gave Natasha a mocking glare. “Darling, don’t you dare suggest-“

Natasha just laughed again, Holding Liho close to her chest, as she leaned in and gave the love of her life another kiss.


End file.
